In the quiet hours of a Portland winter, toddy in hand, the fear used to nag at me: had I rendered myself invisible in the pursuit of my truest self? The answer, I found, was a resounding no. This January, I chose to walk away from what no longer served me, trading the rollercoaster for the steady course of a woman who knows her worth. The winter is cold, but those with whom I share my hearth find a warmth that is absolute.